Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Choosy moms choose...wait, am I supposed to know what I'm doing?

Registering...it's a concept we should be used to since we've previously registered for our wedding.  However, registering for a baby is a totally different experience.  First off, when you register for your wedding, you walk around your favorite store and pick things at random.  These things just might look cool, maybe serve a specific function, and/or you've just always really wanted to say you have (whether or not you intent to ever use it).  Now, registering for a baby...


1. In reality, you're registering for another person.  Yes, the items may be things you'll use on, for or with this other person, but in reality, you have no idea if that little person (who, might I add can't talk) will actually like what you've picked out.
2. By like I mean, not scream bloody murder when you put the item on it (clothing), in it's mouth (bottle or pacifier), on top of it (bedding, blankets etc) or in it (car seat, stroller, random plaything).  If at any time these things deem themselves not satisfactory you could potentially be in for a really long night, car ride and possibly life.
3. So, you hedge your bets and give it your best shot, after all, you don't remember that part of your own childhood anyway.  But here's the kicker...what in the hell does a baby even need?  For this, you would be best served to use the advice of others.  However, this could also back fire in the event that the person you're asking comes from the era of when you held the child on your lap during car rides.  Now, in the unlikely event that this is your one and only "source" you may need to seek out other forms of information. My choice...the internet. Ok, so that opens a totally larger can of worms.  For one, you don't know who or what is credible.  Second, there are soooo many sites it can be confusing and even more than a little daunting.  So, my source...Consumer Reports .  Maybe not the authority on the perfect layette for your baby, but totally helpful when trying to find the "best and safest" out there for those items that really matter.
4. Now you're left with the items that matter, but more than likely won't kill your child.  By this I mean, blankets, sheets, clothing, diaper bags etc.  For these items, you have to (again) scour the internet to find how many and what size you need to properly be prepared.  A lot of sites vary in their quantity needed and for that, mom's who have been there really do offer the best advice.  Like for example, after sending my mom the registry, she said "you know, babies go through about 4 sleepers a day (if you're lucky) so you might want to register for more than the 8 you selected."  See, good point!
5. The best way to register...online.  This serves 2 purposes.  First, there are many more selections available to you than in the store. Second, you can read consumer reviews of other parents who have used those items and get good feedback to find out if something is safe and durable. 
6.  Let's discuss why registering in the store isn't really the best option.  Check above to see the benefits to online registering, but the main reason is deception via overstimulation.  Although the infant section at Target is only about 6 isles long, these 6 isles are filled with weird and totally unnecessary items.  This becomes especially more complicated when registering with an eager and somewhat perplexed spouse who wants to know what every single item is and how it is used. In fact the entire duration of your registering experience may go something like this: 
"What's this thing?
"It's and insert for a diaper genie."
"What's a diaper genie?"
"It's a thing you put diapers in to make them not smell." 
"Do we need one?"
"No." 
"Why not?
"Because we're using nondisposable diapers." 
"Oh, so what do we put the diapers in?"
"A regular diaper pail." 
"What's that?"  and so on...you get the picture.  And this is a good scenario because one of us actually knew what these items were and whether or not they were needed.  Imagine the unsuspecting victim who has no idea what a pacifier is walking into that section of mysterious baby objects.
7.  Since I mentioned it above, we have the choice to go disposable or reusable.  Ok, Ok, Ok, so many parents probably have the best intentions of go the reusable route, but many probably don't follow through on it.  Let's face it, it's a dirty job.  Diaper changing itself is never an easy feat, and now we'll have to wash the diaper as well.  Well, let's go back to my childhood for a minute.  As you all know, I'm the oldest of 4 children. My mom used cloth diapers exclusively. And, being the oldest, I often found myself the diaper changer (not only for my siblings, but also of the daycare children my mom took care of).  Sadly enough, I enjoyed helping with this task.  Fortunately, all those years of experience, combined with many years of babysitting, nannying etc that I did in my teenage years has reinforced my certification of expert diaperer.  Now, back to the cloth diapers.  Back in the day, we only had the rectangle cloth, safety pins and plastic pants option.  Now, I have memories of changing my sister Sara's diapers which would make me about 5-6 years old.  So, if a 5 year old can change cloth diapers, complete with pins and pants, I would think as an adult we can handle the new and improved all-in-one diaper or pocket diaper that now come complete with snaps or velcro instead of pins. As for the washing, again, if I could do it when I was in elementary school, I can do it now as an adult and experienced nurse.  (Now Chris on the other hand...we're currently in search of a fumigation hood as well as a haz-mat suit.)  But, good luck finding a local supplier because you do NOT want to go with the standard cloth diapers you get at Target or something of the like.  Fortunately we have a specialty store in Des Moines who sells them as well as provides free diaper 101 classes. 


In conclusion, who knows what will actually work best, be most used, or never used at all.  For now, we did our best with what we know now.  Luckily, the kid won't have any memories of what we have or don't have and will more likely than not, just be happy to have two loving parents. 

2 comments:

Bev said...

you are so funny!!! what a process you go through!! sometimes I think the internet was invented to make things harder to do! will see you soon!
mom w.

Anonymous said...

Good old cloth diapers! I think we come from the same family... I was the oldest of 3, and with 9 years separating me and the youngest, I changed lots of diapers! Always cloth. Mom was really old-fashioned.

Changing a kicking, thrashing, fussing baby with cloth, pins, and pants- 'rubber pants', was always a challenge. But I always got the job done.

By the time baby sibling number 2 came along, I was well honed at the fine art of diaper folding and changing. Off with the rubber pants, unlatch diaper pins, change diaper, pin fresh diaper, rubber pants back on, all done... I enjoyed the process. So timely.

Lorraine.