When will I get my baby back?

When imagining life as a parent I often thought that the first month would be the hardest. Negating the first week of life spent in the ICU, Ava has been surprisingly easy. Eating well, sleeping at least 5 hours a night, and overall a joy.

Until week 5.

Suddenly a monster was unleashed from the soft folds of baby cuteness. Suddenly feeding has become a chore. After an overproduction problem produced explosive frothy green stools and frequent choking upon latching on I finally investigated and corrected the problem. Now that she's no longer having to choose between air or food you'd think the problem would be fixed. No, she still "fights" me to eat. Often pulling off after a few seconds of sucking only to frantically search out her food source again. This is accompanied by her kicking me and pushing at me with her hands as if I'm trying to smother her (true to some extent). Finally she'll give up and give in but not before exhausting us both. (Maybe this is why she sleeps so well at night.)

Sleep has become another problem. No, not sleeping at night...during the day. Naps have become obsolete. Unless of course I'm holding her. Which, if she had her way I would do all the time. On some days she totals no more than 45 minutes of "nap" time. But then I question the logic of forcing naps. Are her no nap escapades the reason why she sleeps so well at night (last night she slept 9 hours and had to be woke up at 6am)? Do I REALLY need to enforce them? The answer is probably yes. So, I called a friend whose has been through this with 2 children (Tina) and asked advice. The answer...let her cry and she'll tire herself out. So yesterday I wholeheartedly took up that challenge and the result...30 minute nap following 45 minutes of such horrible crying I thought she'd be hoarse today. (Now, I didn't let her cry the entire time of course, I DID go in and pick her up every 15 minutes and consoled her.) The remainder of the day resulted in her screaming her head off EVERY time I put her down whether it was in her crib, on her play mat or to change her diaper. So now I'm thinking I'm not conditioning her to go to sleep on her own, I'm conditioning her to think she's being left every time I lay her down. Needless to say there were no more naps for the rest of the day. Today however, another story. She cried for 15 minutes, was consoled and was asleep in another 5. Success? Probably not...I'm blaming it on the tylenol and the fact that she was immunized today.

Vomiting has become another issue. We're not just talking about a little spit up. Rather, more like something out of Polterguist. Not only am I puked on daily, but my comforter has been ruined, the chair cover in the livingroom is stained and lets just say I'm glad the carpeting hides stains well. Yet, the pediatrician says this is normal. Go figure.

And last but not least, eczema. After arguing with dial-a-nurse over eczema vs. baby acne my conclusion of eczema was validated today by her doctor. Fortunately we have a lot of cute pics pre-eczema because she now looks like a burn victim. Her entire neck, upper chest, upper back, scalp and now her face are covered with the red rash of eczema. Not to mention she's likely to rub herself bald on the back of her head from itching herself against her collar, me or anything else that touches her for that matter. So, now I get to slather her with numerous creams as well as some sparingly applied hydrocortisone cream. Oh, and of course I have to keep her as clean as possible in that region so all that vomit is only adding to the problem.

So now I ask, when can I get a break? She cries when she spits up, cries when she's put down, cries because she itches, cries because she doesn't want to nap. But, at least she sleeps at night...